Eight miles home

 the night they stole my moped

and left me covered in sweat covered in grease 

on a cold night outside Maccas

and me thinking it's eight miles home

I thought that was as bad as it gets

but it wasn't

and you know

i'm gentle

tbat kind of thing doesn't make you tougher

it makes you sadder

it makes you feel the world is cruel

I thought that the laughs and kisses

would last

would be real enough to sustain a dream

they weren't

you were a lie I told myself

and I never knew

because I try not to

the moped turned up 

but if I remember right

I couldn't use it again

somehow it worked out though

I don't remember right

I don't remember at all

you cannot nurture everything

and things rot away if left uncared for

we try not to

but when we look

we find we have

Real love

Sometimes when you're aching with pain
someone talks to you
and you don't quite hear them
and then you remember
no one is speaking
and you are alone

Today I choose you (for Ally)

some days
all I have had to offer have been words
useless and fragile
powerless noises
furious dreams that amount to nothing

but my promises have not been empty
and I told the truth

some days
all I have had to offer have been kisses
whispers and caresses
nothing special
gifts you can get anywhere

but my gestures have not been empty
and I told the truth

some days
all I have had to offer has been love
poorly made and broken
halting and lame
more dream than substance

but my love has not been empty
and I told the truth

today I choose you
not the shadow
not the promise
not an act you might hope to perform
today I choose you
not some other
not something you cannot deliver
not a world that I hope you will build
today I choose you
you and only you and all of you
and I am telling the truth

Perhaps

perhaps you feel
that you cannot be loved

after all
you know yourself
better than they do
and you cannot
will not

perhaps you feel
the stars are just
pinpricks in a night
so dark
it will never be light

perhaps

but let me tell you buddy
you aren't in fact
a snowflake
you are no less
desirable than the next guy
weird as that may sound

you are capable
of feeling beauty
aren't you?

that's all we take to be beautiful
after all

we only ever see the world
through our own eyes
and the world becomes our mirror

you thought it only worked one way?
you are wrong

you are wrong
in the one way you thought
you could not be

definitely

yeah whatever

then I realised you did not want a boy to play with

but a glowering Victorian

all morality and tight trousers

because I frown you think I'm forbidding and you like it

but I was thinking it would be fun

if we just weren't who we are all day long

because life is short and you don't get to be

anyone but you anyway

and I realise that was something of a mistake

if I wanted to keep you and you know

keeping someone is not necessarily

what I wanted but

then I realised keeping them seemed better than losing them

and that's why you end up with regrets

and yeah I would like you to know who I am

but just like anyone I've ever met

you want to know I'm who you know I am instead

and I have to want the same thing

if I want women in my bed

and I do

The possibility of love

I need release
I need my heart to stop beating
I crave your touch
because your touch was fleeting

Do you believe
in the possibility of love
that's lasting
it seems
it dies and all
that's left is pretending

I need a kiss
remind me that I am living
a moment's bliss but
life is unremitting

Have you ever
loved and lost your mind
I have
it was fine

It's like a melody
you heard and then forgot it
but feel it sometimes
lost on a wind
blows up from nowhere
once recognised
it's gone.

Dew

overnight
the weather cooled
and all the grass was dewed
in the morning
the sun was shining
life renewed
and I won't cry over you

we only have
one moment
then the next
and then it's gone
and all we had
were years that passed
and tears to smother
the feelings
that couldn't last

we are all
we can change
the rest is a cage
we are all
we have to hold on to
the rest is chains

in the evening
stormclouds gathering
and soon the rain comes
to wash away
our rusted pain
burnt out by the sun
unloved by anyone.